You Keep Using That Word. I Do not Think It Means What You Think It Means

Editors note: I’ll give a free EMP book to the first commenter who doesn’t know the reference of this post’s title. (Be honest!)

So, speaking of things that people say, but don’t quite know what they mean, I got this email in my mail box the other day:

We cant find your web site.

Stop the tape!

Editors note: Another free EMP book to the first commenter to get that reference!

Hmmm… can’t find my website? That begs the question, how did you get my email address? OK, lets play fair here, suppose they found my email address on some forum, or another website, or some other place that’s NOT my website. Is it really plausible that they could still not have found my website considering my email address is @polepositionmarketing.com and my website is www.polepositionmarketing.com?

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. Roll tape.

Do you have top positioning on the major search engines? If not – we can change that for you today.

Stop the tape. So now they are asking me? I thought they couldn’t find me (I have to make the assumption here they meant through the search engines.) But now they are unsure, maybe they actually could find me if they tried (which of course they already did). But hey, I’m glad they can get me top rankings today. Not tomorrow, today!

Roll tape.

You can have the best positions and stay there indefinitely. Our prices are rock bottom and our methods are unbeatable.

Stop tape. Rock bottom prices? Unbeatable methods? There are a few things in life I won’t pay “rock bottom” prices for. Lawyers, doctors, concrete work and SEO. You get what you pay for with each of these.

Roll tape.

Better – we will PROVE it. Interested?

Ah, no.

But now I’m wondering… maybe they really didn’t find my website. If they had, they’d know that we offer proffessional search engine optimization services. But we don’t offer rock bottom prices, just superb service and results.